I have had the most terrible week.
And I'm not being melodramatic...it REALLY was awful.
I ended up in hospital having emergency surgery.
Told you it was bad!!
What is worse is that these things always seem to happen right when you AREN'T fully on top of everything. There is no food in the house, the beds arent made...well actually its kind of a normal day in NotQuiteSupermom land...but still...I wouldn't invite people IN to the house with it looking like that. Dont want to completely blow my cover..
When I was in hospital I had this phone call from my mother (who was very kindly helping Mr G with the kids and the f^*$ up of a house:
Mother: "Hello Darling. Everything is just fine at home. HOWEVER I am struggling somewhat to fully understand your washing system?
NotQuiteSupermom: "That would be because there isnt a system. There are just piles. Some piles are clean...some piles are dirty. Its very simple. Perhaps if you sniff the clothes it might help?
Mother: "Hmmm...maybe I will just wash everything again."
NotQuiteSupermom: "What a jolly good idea Mother. Perhaps you would care to iron them as well?????"
Am thinking this "being in hospital" malarky actually is quite good.
Maybe I should do it more often. Then the house would be cleaner, the kids would eat better and there would be a washing system.
Am lying in my hospital bed marvelling at just how great being in hospital is. Except for the old people and the really sick people...because that just sucks for them. Obviously since having the drip/ lots of drugs and extra blood I am feeling like a whole new reinvigorated NotquiteSupermom. Keep accidentally calling the hospital a HOTEL to the doctors and nurses.
Do you know...
1. In hospital/ hotel they bring round tea/ coffee on a trolley periodically? AND you dont have to get out of bed OR make it yourself?
2. They bring you breakfast, lunch AND dinner. In bed! How much does that rock! Dinner in bed! V. indulgent
3. You have your own personal TV. So you can watch WHATEVER you want!! No kids programmes!! AND you can eat dinner, in bed, infront of the TV!! I can live like this!
4. The TV also has your own personal computer!! For Facebook, emails, online clothes shopping. EVERYTHING! While you eat dinner/ lunch/ breakfast. IN BED!!
5. There are magazines EVERYWHERE. So when you get bored watching TV or online shopping you can catch up on the latest celebrity gossip. For free! While eating your breakfast/ lunch/ dinner. IN BED!
6. People come and see you and bring you stuff. Like chocolates and flowers. Even Mr G brought flowers. And I didnt have to ask for them. Feel like a superstar. Just for getting ill!
Am thinking of setting up a NotQuiteSupermom hotel. Kind of like Rehab for the stressed out moms. You check yourself in for a night, we send round cleaners and people to clean the children/ feed them good proper food and then we let you stay in bed, cook for you and let you eat it in bed, bring you drinks and let you watch TV, surf the net, read magazines, eat chocolate and go to sleep.
Anyone want to check in???